Yoga: Heaven or Hell?

Went to a yoga class last night. Truthfully, I was not looking forward to it at all. I didn’t think I’d like all the crazy poses and such. It was a gift from my dear husband, three months ago on my birthday he gave me an introductory session. I put it off until the certificate was about to expire. I have a cold, so I really wasn’t feeling up to going, but I didn’t want to disappoint AR, so I went.

As soon as I stepped into the office I felt as if I were in a different world. The lighting was dimmed; soothing Asian music was playing and there was a fresh pot of tea brewing beside a water fountain gently splashing water. Maybe this was my kind of place.

I was asked to fill out a form, and I did. One of the questions: weight _____. Why in the hell do they need to know that? I filled it out anyway and then checked off some boxes as to why I wanted to come to yoga. No, gift certificate was not a choice and neither was guilt. I chose: relaxation, improved emotional health and weight loss. Why not?

Then this tiny Asian woman came out and looked at my form. She took me into another room and closed the door once I was inside. There was one yoga mat on the floor. She told me that she wanted to evaluate me before class. She had me lifting my legs, turning my head and arms and stretching all different ways. When I was lying on the floor, she pulled on my feet and said my right side of my body was longer than my left side. She said I was imbalanced.

She had me breathe in and out and told me that I was not breathing properly. Huh? I’m alive, aren’t I? My breaths were too shallow. I need to breathe from my diaphragm. Then she touched my upper back and neck and said there was a lot of tension there. I was holding on to too much inside and need to let it out. My CHI is not flowing properly. When I am stressed, it always goes to my neck and upper back, but I’m sure most other people have the same symptoms.

I was a little out of breath by the time she finished evaluating me. In fact, I thought about maybe just going home, but the opportunity did not present itself as she shuttled me into the other room where the yoga class would begin. They showed me this intestinal exercise and we started doing that right away. As people came into the classroom, they just joined right in. Before I knew it, the class began.

You know what? It didn’t suck. I enjoyed it. It was challenging for me since I am so out of shape, but I found it invigorating and relaxing at the same time. It wasn’t a traditional “dog facing down” yoga class, I am happy to report. It was very much like the stretching exercises we did in tae kwon do. The only difference is that the stretching didn’t stop! It was a great work out. I couldn’t do everything due to my bad knee and excess weight, but I was able to do so much that I impressed the instructor. Of course, I failed to realize that the class was 70 minutes long! Christ, that is a loooong time, especially when you don’t know anyone and your muscles were getting wobbly from holding positions for such a length of time and you thought it was a 45 minute class!

They brought in a cup of tea for everyone, but I figured that this was my time to exit. I thought it would be awkward sipping tea with these people. I don’t know why. Maybe on another night it wouldn’t have seemed so strange, but I still was unable to make a quick getaway. They had to make their sales pitch, right? I sat through that and told her I was interested, but not sure when I could start classes. I know they will be calling me to get me back in.

I really think this would be great for me, once I've lost some weight after the surgery and I am cleared to exercise vigorously. I just can’t see starting it now, but I also don’t feel the need to tell them all the details of my life either. Of course, I am telling all of you, so I guess, what’s the difference? Good point.